“This post is a part of#UseYourAnd activity at BlogAdda in association with Gillette Venus“.
“Either stay in your limits like any wife stay like or leave the damn house!”- Whenever she tried to say something,my father would shut her off.
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“Either live like the way I want you to live,or leave the house!”-My mother would hear from him,whenever she would try to cross my dad’s already assigned limits for her.
‘Why this? Why cannot I make a choice? Why do I always need to choose between the two given options. Am I no one to myself?’-My mom would spend her nights,thinking.
She was not tied to do any thing she wanted,it was like she didn’t has the idea of embracing her “AND”.
She always used to try to choose between choices,that too the choices others would put infront of her. She was not allowed to talkback I suppose,that was the reason why she faced so much humiliation.
But with changing time,mom started sensing the importance of her ‘AND’. She raised her voice,as she thought her husband would hear her and let her do whatever she wanted to do. But no! Time changed,she changed,but what didnot change was my dad’s mentality. He shut her down again.
Time passed a bit more,and one day came a lady,who was so close to our family. She asked mom,if she would like to join the school,she was working in. My mom was ready but again,for my family,rituals and traditions were important. Mom’s marriage was quite fresh that time,and her going out the house that too for working,was not correct according to their so called tradition.
My mom remained quiet that time too,for she didnot know the real face of them. Some more years later,after I was born and maybe like studying in class eighth,My granny died because of something complicated. Mom was broken,yet she smiled,maybe for me and my brother (yes he had taken birth too).
Time never stopped passing and life slowly came on the track-well this’s what she thought. I’d grown up by that time and was in class tenth when the whole scenerio started and continued.
Dad was acting strange those days,no sweet talks no laughs,instead his eyes used to stare my mom like she was some criminal. After a whole week of staring thing,my dad decided to do something. Something I couldn’t believe he would do to anyone.
There was this boy and his family who were living in the vacant rooms,present upstairs,as tenants. And that was where all this got started. My dad had started doubting my mom,over that boy;as if her and that boy were involved in a secret affair.
Now,the schedule had changed,so was the dad. Mom used to hear the tantrums,the beatings,but all of all she was surviving and that was enough for her. Maybe or maybe not. Afterall she was a human too like us,after like the torture of two-three months,she decided to not give up now. In our family,’daughter-in-laws’ were not supposed to do any work or to step outside their respective house. My mother had faced everything till the time,she decided to step out of her limits. She started applying for the job in the every school of the city,be it the big ones or say the small ones. But it didnot affect her determination.
From being an idealistic wife,she now also wanted to be a perfect teacher. She had almost erased all the ‘or’ of her life and was already working to accept the things all together. A month passed and there was still no response from the schools,she had applied for. Maybe,because she was not that educated or maybe she was not the one. Oh well,all her doubts got cleared when one fine day she was called from one nearby school to join. Though they agreed to take her in,but the salary was only 600 rupees. That was enough anyway for her,she’d started working because she wanted to forget everyday’s chaos not for the money.
Everything had become quite easy for her now,she would get ready everyday and would go to her school,after doing all the chores,she used to do before joining it. Days were passing so fast and we were growing too. (I and my brother). Mom wanted to make us capable enough to earn something for ourselves in future,unlike our father. For that,she needed to admit us in some CBSE school,but she knew she would need more money for that. She asked dad and to her luck he agreed too,that time we’re financially stable so studying in a good school was not an issue. Again there were my relatives to stand as an obstacle in the path. They tried to distract my mom,but my mom was one stubborn lady and had decided to take this decision,without any compromise.
In the end she succedeed,my grand paa used to say-“You are here to change my son,just change him”.
We had become mature enough to understand our mom’s problem,but we could do nothing about that instead of studying. My brother was still innocent to understand anything,but he was good in studies. So he was not a problem at all.
Mom was worried about me and her worry was breaking her inside or maybe she was transforming into more strong woman. And I was right,she was now more ferocious,straight-forward and talkative woman. She would fight back all the talks dad would do to her,about her affair. She was now one strong woman,and for being one,
she need not to repeat the beatings she was having everyday from dad. Dad and his mentality couldnot be changed but her personality has changed from then to now. If we speak about her current job,then let me tell you she is now working as a teacher in one of the best schools here,with a good salary. My dad doesnot beat her now,but he does torture us mentally. I am now an emotional wreck and still trying hard to be like her;On the other side mom was not at all an emotional freak,maybe she has found the real meaning of her. Now she doesnot make choices,she just does whatever she feels like doing for her children.
Maybe,just maybe my mom’s story is not that interesting to read for you,but she always used to say to me:
“Being a strong woman is not about behaving like a man. Instead, it is about embracing your femininity and showing it to the world, while making sure that you take control of the things that you’re doing and get them done.”
This is why motherhood is one of the best proofs of how strong women can be. Addition to this she is the woman who never cared for the labels people put her with,she created her all labels on her own,without the limits of any one. She is the lady who made me write this story to show all the women the power of faith,belief and most of all the power of “AND”.

Rock the world with your pen.
love,
Ritu ❤

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